Sex before marriage

by Liz

Growing up as a teen I've faced temptation to take it 'further' with my close boyfriend whom I really loved but was unsure whether it was right to have sex before I was married. I really struggled with that debate in my head until one day I unconsciously let go of myself and let it happen.

I started regretting soon after but realized that it was too late, what I had so precious to me was gone.

Now my question is what exactly does God say about having sex before getting married and will I get punished? Also should I stop any sexual activity and repent?

Please help!


Thank you for your question and for being real and honest. Believe me, you are not the only girl that has felt this way or has faced these circumstances.

I certainly made sexual choices before marriage that I regret. I know God has forgiven me, but I still have had to work through the pain.

This is one of the reasons I feel so strongly about sharing with teen girls God's standards for sex. I'm not pointing a finger of judgment at anyone, I have been there and gone through it myself. Sexuality has been an area in which God has given me freedom and now I want to lead others to that same freedom I've found. So know that I won't condemn you, but I will challenge you to live a higher, godly standard in your sexual life.

To know more about what God says about sex before marriage, I would encourage you to read this entire page I wrote:
The Definition of Sex

Ultimately, God desires us to keep sex within marriage. Kind of like keeping a "fire in the fireplace." Outside the fireplace, that fire will cause damage, just like sex outside marriage will cause pain and heartbreak.

More than anything, I want you to know that there is forgiveness and hope for you. God does have a standard for sex and desires you to be pure, but when you sincerely come to him for forgiveness, he will cleanse you and release you from any punishment. That's an awesome thought, huh?

If you are wanting to please God with this area of your life, then I would recommend coming to Him and asking for His help to change. He desires you to be pure in this area and offers forgiveness to you.

The Power of Forgiveness

Once, you have received forgiveness and also forgiven yourself the next step is repentance.

Steps of Repentance

Know that we are here for you in this journey. You are not alone. The enemy, Satan, wants you to believe that you are alone and that it is too hard to change. That's a lie! God's power is greater than anything we've done in our lives. I'm living proof of this.

"Though we live in this world, we do not wage war as this world does. Our weapons are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary they have divine power to demolish strongholds." 2 Corinthians 10:3-4.

Please keep in touch and let us know how we can continue to encourage and support you.

Praying for you,

Comments for Sex before marriage

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by: Luann


Hey girl. If you're wondering, I'm just a teen like you. Purity is indeed precious. In marriage, it's one big gift you can offer to that 'special' someone. Of course, I'm not blaming you for anything because we are all not perfect. Anyway, yea it's a good thing to repent and like what I did, put this on your mind: "true love waits". lol. i got it from Jordin Sparks <3 haha. In my bible study, we've tackled it once saying that sex is a matter of unity between two people who have undergone the sacred ceremony [marriage].

Uhm I'm just giving a situation, yes, these two people love each other so much and decided to do it but what if the girl gets pregnant? then what? or yea, the guy said that he won't leave you, but what will happen after that? being a parent is not easy especially a 'young' parent.

Just try to enjoy each other's company because there's a consequence for every actions that you make. I hope I helped you... If i'm offensive please do let me know and just in case you have problems i'm here ^_^ a virtual friend ready to serve... i'll pray for you!


sex before marriage hurts
by: Anonymous

I'm sixty and I still hurt knowing my wife had sex before we got married I didn't know if I was just a man who would be only there to stand in. Or someone who God chose to love her unconditionally with all of my heart. To this day marriage is fruitful but also painful to me in many ways. I have forgiven her but I can't forget.

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