by S'ambrosia Curtis
Growing up, I always had this fantasy that some incredibly talented and good looking artist would stand on a stage, and out of thousands of girls standing in the crowd, he would pick me. He would look me in the eyes and say, "You. You're the one I want." I would look around and see girls with better physical features and qualifications than myself, but then I would look back up and see his eyes intently fixed on me with his hand extended toward me.
A few years ago, my fantasy came true...
During my winter break from school, I went to Kansas City to attend my very first Onething conference. They're put on by a group called IHOP (International House of Prayer). One night, during worship, we were singing this song about how much God loves us. A lot of times it's really easy to just sing the words and not really let the lyrics flow from my heart, but that night I was really feeling connected to God and in touch with His heart.
All of sudden I heard, "I choose you. You are mine."
Instantly I was overwhelmed and started sobbing. All my life I fantasized that a man would say those words to me, but there I was in a crowd of thousands of people hearing the Fairest of ten thousand tell me that He (God) delights in me. Imagine with me, for a second, how you would feel in that moment. Close your eyes and picture the setting. What do you feel? I felt so special and beautiful and loved. How awesome is it that the same God who created all that we know, and that which we're completely unaware of, would call me by name and say that He wants to be with me?
When I got back to school, I was a girl completely in love. I would think about Him all day, I would go into a study room and dance for hours to worship music and I don't know how to describe this, but I would even feel my heart thriving in His love while I was sleeping. That sounds weird, I know, but for a few days I had restless sleep because my heart would seriously be saturated in love and full of joy. I don't know if I'm describing it well enough, but I can say this: I have never felt love that strongly before, and I never will with anyone else.
I'm 24 now and still completely in love with God. I admit that my heart doesn't feel exactly like it did at that point, but I'm seeking to get rid of all the distractions so that I can dwell in His love again. When you love someone, you make a lot of sacrifices for them. Jesus gave His life up for each and every one of us so that we could have a way to be with Him for all of eternity. My sacrifice also requires giving up my life. I commit myself to Him, so the desires of my flesh have to go.
This website is a great reminder and source of encouragement for me that my life is not my own. I belong to my Beloved and I desire to please Him with every aspect of my life.