I feel like a failure

I feel very depressed... I don't normally feel that way... I am known as the "cheerful and playful" girl. The thing is, I am so disliked everywhere. The reason? its because I am different. Different from the rest of the people. I don't have friends... Only imaginary ones. God is my friend. People are so mean, they tease me so much I sometimes try to kill myself. They have physically abused me and did some horrible things. Its so complicated, its hard to explain. When I am at home, I let myself be myself, I am hyper, i talk a lot, but when I am at school, I never feel right... People just think I am weird... :(

I don't like people feeling bad for me so I don't show my depressed side, or tell anyone what had happened to me because they won't believe it because some of them are pretty tragic...
PLEASE help

Comments for I feel like a failure

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:)
by: Gigi

I used to be you- I was bullied, I wanted to kill myself, and I became so utterly depressed I could barely stand up.
I'm different too!! Just today I was thinking, "Jeez, I wish I wasn't so tall" then I instantly took it back because I have to embrace my height, not try to hide it!
I'm 13 years old, 5 "8", have a HUGE amount of curly hair, my real name is Virginia (you can imagine the teasing), and I have a bigger chest than most girls. For a 13 year old, 5 "8" is pretty tall, and I always felt like a giant. I hated my height, my hair, my chest, my legs, my face. Whenever I'm feeling sorry for myself, my looks, or how I'm "different" I have to remember, "GOD NEVER MAKES MISTAKES!" NEVER! I dont care if you say, "oh, well, I must've been his only mistake." NO! NADA! I have to catch myself when I think, "I'm a mistake," because God DOESN'T make mistakes. HE NEVER DOES! Everything, and I mean everything, God makes is never a mistake and is never ugly.
So what if you're different? How BORING would the world be if everyone was the same? There would be no individuality!! Being different is AWESOME! I used to hate my curly hair, I used to say, "Oh, god, I wish I looked more normal," but then I'd look out at the sea of brown hair and brown eyes and smile to myself and say, "Thank You, God, I'm not one of them. I'm just me."
EVERYONE is different!! EVERYONE!! Even twins are different!
If you're hyper, be hyper, if you have brown, stringy hair, tilt your chin up to the sky and say, "I HAVE STRINGY HAIR AND I DONT GIVE A CRAP!", if you like to run around and scream and have fun, do it to the point where you collapse, but DO NOT CHANGE. For ANYBODY. And I mean ANYBODY! When girls at school are like, "Do you realize how annoying you are?" My response is, "Yeah, I probably am. At least I'm having fun with it!" Sometimes they'll scoff, roll their eyes, or say, "You're so weird," but even though it may sting a little, BE YOURSELF.
Dont ever change. EVER! I forbid you from changing :)

If you ever need more advice, just ask :)

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