how do i know i love him?

by Tiffany
(san antonio tx, usa)

i've been with my boyfriend for a year. i don't get any butterflies or anything that people say you get, but most of the time, i enjoy just being with him and talking to him. he's my best friend, but the thought of marriage scares me, but at the same time it seems like it'd be so wonderful to with him as husband and wife. how do i know he's the one for me? everytime i pray and ask that question i always end up having a dream of him cheating or getting me pregnant before we marry, or one of his girl friends starts flirting with him right in front of me. why does that keep happening while i'm looking for an answer?? is that my answer? what does it mean?

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Dec 13, 2010
by: Shea

I was the same way with my now husband. I didn't get the butterfly feeling or anything. There were times when we were engaged that I thought seriously about breaking it off. But one thing I've learned about marriage, is that it is all about commitment. To be committed to someone even during the worst of times. It also means to be selfless, because its not about what you can gain from them or what they can do for you.

I believe that the negative and hurtful thoughts you get when you pray about your relationship is spiritual warfare. Lies that will fill your head. Also if you are having sex before marriage, I strongly recommend stopping. Talking from experience, it will only harm the relationship, even in marriage. Women will unconsciously look at their man as their protector and when you have sex before marriage(this includes oral & any sexual release) the women will feel betrayed, whether you initiated or realize it. In Ephesians 5:25-27, God commands husbands to love their wives the same way Christ loves us, making us holy, pure, unblemished. Also when we sexually sin, we are sinning against our own bodies. No other sin does this, so it must be a big deal. I pray that you find this to be helpful.

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