Cutting

by Devin
(Arvada, CO)

I am 13 and my mom and dad abuse me and have ever since I can remember. I cut myself because it makes me feel good and I can forget about all of my emotional problems.

My parents never believe me when I tell them that the other one is abusing me and they tell me that I'm stupid and I have no clue of what I'm talking about! I can talk to my brother about it but he has a girlfriend and she is exactly like me so I let her get all of the special attention cause I know she is way more sensitive to pain that I am.

I started cutting myself in 7th grade after I lost my grandma(she was the only person that would never do anything to hurt me) and it killed me. I tried killing myself but it never worked so I gave up on it.

Then I found out my mom was drinking again(she's a hardcore alcoholic) and she heard me talking to my brother about it and she came down to our basement cause I was hanging out with my BFF and she was screaming at me threatening me and the next thing I knew I was on the floor having a major panic attack!

My BFF called my big bro and she told him everything and he finally got me to calm down and he told me I wasn't safe and that I had to call the police. But I didn't because I was scared that my dad would hurt my brother and I was wishing I would've left but I didn't so now I cut everyday and I am scared to death that someone will find out.