Beloved Story Beautifully Broken
Isa 53:5 But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.
I am Anna. A seventeen year old, far from ordinary. I found a true love everlasting, I found love grander then the mountains. It has been a year. A new beginning into a life with my Beloved (As a christian).
Ever since I was a little girl, I remembered this burning sadness inside my heart. Looking into the mirror and thinking how ugly I was. I was a little overweight as a child, and the children made me feel even worse. I grew up believing these horrid lies.
Lies of being, "ugly, fat, stupid, worthless." In my teen years, I became darker than most teens at my school. Dressing dark, and being mean to people. I became bulimic, and anorexic. I cut and I was obsessed with exercise. I also became into the satanic. I threw up 5 times a day. And when I felt guilty I would starve myself.
I started losing so much weight. 10 lbs here, 20 lbs there. I felt on top of my world. I felt strong. Everyone commented me on how much weight I had lost and how beautiful, and sexy I looked. I loved hearing it, and that was all I lived for. "Looks." I remember starving for 9 days. Looking back at my lost times, I thank my love, my God for being with me, and not letting me die. I started to throw up blood, and my hair started to fall out. My life was a dark abyss, and I couldnt escape from it.
I tried killing myself, taking pills. And nothing worked. I went to a hospital and stayed for a week. I was alive walking dead. I cut myself so much, I missed a couple of important veins that could have ended my life. To cut this beloved story short, my God, my savior saved me. I no longer, cut, throw up, starve. He rescued me, my knight in shining armor. And any of you going through this, or extremely tough times. Reach out to God. No matter if your clouds turn grey, your heart seems to shatter. God can pick up your missing pieces and make you whole <3
I could fill up thousands of pages of what I have gone through. Thousands of pages of how Jesus saved me, and how wonderful he is. But that clearly wouldn't be enough. You too can find a life everlasting, you too can be free! You are all beautiful, and precious. And remember to not look at worldly beauty, for that beauty is fake. True beauty lies within the soul, and lies within Jesus the one who saves you, and transforms you into the most beautiful creation ever.
Please if you ever need a friend to talk to, have questions.
Comment below because i would love to talk to you
Godbless you <3