I am a regular cutter

by April

It started at the beginning of 8th grade. My mom had an affair and I was left with my dad brother and sister. I fought a lot with my dad and siblings...I couldn't take it.

So I started cutting. I cut at least once to twice a week my entire 8th grade year. During the summer I started to cheer up and focus on fun. I didn't cut during that summer but when school rolled around again it was twice as bad.

I cut almost everyday now.

I cant stop.

It's obsessive.

It feels so good.

I have scars all the way up my right arm and I will soon start my left. I know its wrong and please no one take this as just an idea.

It's addictive. Don't start.

I hope that one day I can stop, but as of now
I will try.

Thanks for listening to my story. Please don't be concerned. I won't die...I promise!

Comments for I am a regular cutter

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Precious April
by: Diane

April --

As I read your story, my heart broke for all your pain and suffering. It seems the devil works extra hard these days to destroy the spirits of our young.

April, there are some things I'd really like to know to clarify things. Is there anyone you feel you can trust that you could go to for help? Are you going to church or a youth group? Is there a Christian group at school? Have you talked to God about your pain and your desire to quit cutting? Have you given your heart to Jesus?

I ask these things, April, because you really NEED someone personally available to help you through this. And even more, you need Jesus in your life to help you overcome this addiction.

Do you know God feels your pain and knows your suffering? Not only that, but He understands.

Psalm 56:8 [The Message] says, "You've kept track of my every toss and turn through the sleepless nights, each tear entered in your ledger, each ache written in your book."

Not only that, but He wants to help you find a way out.

1 Corinthians 10:13 [TNIV] says, "You are tempted in the same way that everyone else is tempted. But God can be trusted not to let you be tempted too much, and he will show you how to escape from your temptations."

He wants to show you a way out of the pain and out of the addiction, April.

I hope it's okay to pray for you right here, right now, because I think you need to KNOW that others care for you, April, others hurt with you, others want to help and love you.

So here goes:

Heavenly Father, we lift April to You. Lord, Your word says that You see our tears, you say that you know every tear April has shed, every ounce of pain she has felt, and You have kept a record of them.

Heavenly Father, right now I ask that You show April Your absolute love for her. Lift her in Your arms, Father, as a loving daddy does with his own child, for she is Yours. Hold her and gently wipe each tear as it falls, and let her know that she is loved.

Father, I ask that You would surround April with friends and role models who have a heart for You and Your ways, those who will be there to support April, to listen to her, and to help her through these difficult times.

Father, right now I break the chains that hold her in this addiction and I speak to them right now and say to loose your hold on her NOW, in Jesus' name!!

Bring to Your healing, Lord, that she may be a witness to Your glory.

Thank You, Father, for hearing us now, for touching April, and for showing her the real April, the loved April, the forgiven and healed April. In Jesus' name, amen.

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