Running low? Overwhelmed?
by Shelley Hitz
I've become overwhelmed. Trying to do too much.
It's an unending cycle that I tend to struggle with.
I do too much, so I set boundaries and do less. But, then it seems like the lurking monster grows again into something unmanageable again and I repeat the cycle all over again. Okay, I'm probably being overly dramatic here. But, this is something I struggle with.
As I was working through some of my emotions this morning in my journal, here is what I wrote...
"I feel loaded down and I know this isn't from you Lord. As I was thinking about my time and my day and all I wanted to do, it felt overwhelming. But, when I thought about You and how You are able to lead me through my day most effectively, I began to relax. You know what the girls that contact me through my website need and you are able to provide it! It doesn't have to come through me! Praise God for that!
I don't have to carry around the burden of feeling responsible for them, all I need to do is listen to You. What a paradigm shift! A change in perspective! I'm not the one ultimately responsible. You will show me the way to go.
It's so easy for me to become over committed. To lose balance. And the first thing that happens is my connection with You, God, begins to fade. It gets disrupted. Kind of like bad cell phone coverage. It's hard to hear Your voice, our 'calls' get dropped and my 'battery' runs low.
It's time to plug in and find the place where my connection with You is the strongest. For me, it's not in a flurry of activity, but in stillness. Not in reading, but in listening. Sometimes just sitting in silence or listening to instrumental worship music.
I am not alone. My Father is always with me. He will strengthen me and uphold me. He will take me by the hand and show me which way to go."
I felt a burden lift. I shed a few tears. And I sensed God saying to me, "Ask me first before diving into something."
Sounds so easy. Common sense, right? But, so often I don't practice it. Instead I just charge right in without even asking God.
A lesson I learned from Lauren...
Recently my sister was in town and I told my 3 year old niece, Lauren, that I was going to spend the night and have a sleepover with them at Grammie's house. She looked over at her mom and said, "Mom, is it okay if Aunt Shelley comes over for a sleepover?"
I couldn't help but smile. Of course it was okay. But, I loved the innocence displayed in her question. I loved the fact that she has learned to ask her mom and dad first.
I want to see more of that kind of attitude in me....asking my Heavenly Father, "Is this okay with you?" "What do you have for me today?"
And then take the time to actually listen.
That's sometimes the hardest part.
My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me.
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
This is what the LORD says— your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: "I am the LORD your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.
Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it."