issues with myself

by kailee
(washington)

im 13 years old and 5'4 weighing 111 pounds. everyone tells me im skinny... but i dont believe them. i keep trying to lose weight the healthy way, but its not working. about a month ago i started going on a pretty healthy diet. i weighed myself today and i've only lost two pounds in one month! that wasn't good enough for me. i dont want my family to think i'm starving myself so i eat dinner. i try not to eat throughout the day but i always give in, and then i feel guilty. so i work out. and i'm still not losing much weight. i've heard all the bad stories about starving yourself so i try not to do it as much, i've made myself throw up after meals but only a couple of times. i just think that if i was skinnier, boys would like me. i've never actually had a real boyfriend, and i just want someone to want me as much as i want them.... i used to cut myself, but i stopped about a month ago. because i found a new way to deal with the pain- which is losing weight. i dont feel good enough for anyone and im always disappointed with myself. i dont know what to do anymore, no one understands me.... i would never try and kill myself but im just so lost right now... i feel happier when i can see that i've lost weight

Comments for issues with myself

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You Don't Need to Lose Anything
by: Anonymous

They are right though. Your weight is perfect for your height. Barfing afterwards can still injure you, you don't want to hurt yourself. Maybe you should talk to someone. Plus some of your weight is muscle - not fat, which is good.
There is hope
by: Alison

In my opinion, 13 is quite young to be dieting. Your body is just beginning a very important time of growth, both inside and out. It is more important now, then ever before, that you get the right amount of healthy nourishment. Also, the fact that you want to hide the dieting from your family is a red flag. In many cases, our family knows us pretty well and has a pretty good idea of what's best for us.

But, it sounds like there are deeper reasons why you want to turn to starvation and exercise as an outlet. I can relate to feeling disappointed in yourself. I'd love to share my story with you and talk about some ways that I've found to deal with these issues, if you are interested. My email address is awatson421@gmail.com. Hope to hear from you! :-)
i understand
by: kare

hun its hard to go through what you are going through i hope you know that God loves you just the way you are He created you He has nothing but UNCONDITIONAL LOVE FOR YOU. I suggest read Psalms 139 the whole chapter but when you get to VERSW 14 ASK YOUR YOURSELF HOW DOES THIS MAKE ME FEEL. IN PSALMS 139:14 THAT IS THE VERSE THAT STANDS OUT IT SAYS: WE ARE FEARFULLY N WONDERFULLY MADE. N IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO REALIZE THAT N TO THIS DAY I SAY MY LIFE/PASSAGE IS THAT VERSE N PSALMS 139 ITS OUR LOVE LETTER FROM GOD TO US. GOD BLESS YO
"More Beautiful You"
by: Nikola

Know this, God has created you perfectly. There can never be a more beautiful you. I'm going to be honest. I'm 18 and I've struggled with my weight all my life. I've lived on diet and all have failed me. Nothing will work. It's so hard, and in desperation, I began to starve myself in August. I worried my best friend so much that he lost sleep and he literally spent hours begging me to eat as he saw me grow weaker and weaker...After a point he stopped begging because he knew i wouldn't but he still worried like crazy. I starved myself for about 3 months and the opposite of what I wanted happened... I gained weight! I dont know what stopped me but I knew I needed to because I did not want to worry him anymore... I still want to starve myself but then I remember that there can never be a more beautiful me, and the same with you. God created you perfectly.
You are a wonderful creation!
by: Anonymous

Kailee! I've never met you but I wish I could, just so that I could give you a big hug and tell you that you are beautiful! You're beautiful because the God that created the universe- that same mighty, powerful, amazing God, created you and had an amazing plan for you before you were even born! I know that you have probably heard this before, but it really does change your entire view of yourself when you think about it. Something that I remember when I think badly of my body is that God created me the way I am, and to criticize my body means that I am criticizing the God that created it! I hope you can see that, and realize that your value comes from Christ alone and not from your looks or what other people think of you. And just one more thing- I pray that you have accepted Christ as your Savior, because when you are upset and want to hate or even hurt yourself, He is the first and best one to turn to. Jesus is the only person who can bring true comfort. Sorry for this being so long, Have a happy New Years! :) ~ Your sister in Christ, Erin
Same Way
by: Anonymous

As I read this, I thought you were me. I'm 13, 5'5' and 110 pounds. Like you, I would never try to kill myslef, but am lost, i feel alot better know that girls that are so much like me go through this too. I'm going to get help, and I hope you do too, wish you the best.
love
by: Sarah-Anne Elizabeth

Hm, you sound alot like me when i was this age. Honestly honey, the only thing that can make you feel "found" and not "lost" is Jesus. Call out to Him. He loves you so much, I understand that losing weight can feel amazing, like you're losing all your problems along with it, but your not, like cutting, its a temporary relief. The pain inside comes back. and everytime we harm ourselves in any way, it's like we are slapping Jesus in the face, it's like we are saying "your blood wasnt enough." And sweety His blood is more than enough. I pray you seek after God and let Him tell you what He thinks of you.
I love you <3

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