I'm never alone!
Hi, my name is Shar and I am 22 years old. I have a 1 year old daughter and a loving fiance. I know that God is real and I know that he loves me unconditionally. Without him I wouldn't be able to smile everyday.
At one point in my life I was very lonely. I have a big family and a lot of friends that really care for me and always have but when I was a teen I still felt so alone. When I was around people I wanted to be alone but when I was alone I wanted to be around people. I would cry almost everyday and I was angry most of the time. I thought I was crazy because most of the time I had no idea why I felt that way. I never told anyone but my best friend how I felt and somethings I never even told her. I got some relief from things we shared but it came to an end after senior year.
When we went away to college I had a nervous break down. I started keeping even more to myself. I started seeing a counselor and almost took medication for depression. I started to doubt God or that he was real at all. I didn't know if I believed in him because I was taught to or because I really believed in him. For a while I was just blank and I felt even worse than before. I slept my days away and shut my friends and family out.
I was apart of a Gospel choir at my college and I had gained a new group of friends through the choir. I reached out to them because I was so tired of feeling lifeless. They talked to me about life, and school, and God and the reasons I had been feeling so depressed. I had come to find that my problems were not really mine and that I was carrying the weight of my family's issues with me, and had been for years.
I started talking to God again because I was so completely lost I didn't know what else to do, I started attending church and keeping those new friends dear. I had another breakdown but it was because I was overwhelmed by God's love and that I knew deep down inside that he was real all along. I had been so weak that I lost my faith.
Going through that has made me so strong. The relationship I have with God now is so beautiful. I know that he loved me even through that, when I was unsure of him. When I thought that I was walking alone, God was loving me even harder. I had to go through all that turmoil, to see the sun. If I could go back I wouldn't change a thing. Loving God has taught me how to love myself and those around me, no matter if they hurt, forget, or don't believe in me. Loving God, I have learned that I never have to feel alone, because he will never leave nor forsake me!
Click here to post comments
Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Power of Your Testimony.