I NEED HELP IMMEDIATELY!!!!!!!!

by completely freaked out friend
(USA)

this is kinda long, but please read it!!!

so last night i was at a sleepover with several friends from my Christian middle school. one of my friends (lets call her friend1) said that she cuts. her parents are divorced, and her family is broken. i don't think shes a Christian. she then went on to tell us a long story. she almost cried and said she felt so bad and sinful.

here's a short version of the story... over the past few months, she and the school head master's son, (14, we'll call him) had "talked about doing something". he kept asking her about it. he would try to schedule a time and place. every time, he, 14, would cancel because he "liked someone". he would reschedule it just to cancel again. the whole time she felt sick about it, but didn't tell anyone. last week, at an after school club, he kept touching her under the table. later, he said, "follow me". she went with him, and he took her to the staircase landing right below the roof, where no one goes. they made out and touched each other in places they really shouldn't. it ended when 14 said "i would love to get down on the floor with you if we had more time, but i have to be somewhere", kissed her again, and left. friend1 would never do this kind of thing, normally. she just felt so secure by the way he kept pursuing her. she said the whole time, she loved it in a sick way. apparently, she was the third girl he had done this with. 14 and friend1 broke up over a year ago.

the BIG problem is, the next day, last Thursday, he started going out with friend2, who wasn't at the sleepover with us. friend2 doesn't know about what he does with other girls. she already holds hands and hugs him. we are so afraid that he will do the same thing with her-- or worse. since he is dating her, he will make more time for her. we know by his past that he will make out with her, touch her privates, reach in her clothes.... and possibly have sex with her. (maybe get her pregnant??) that's not who she is, though. shes a virgin. a nice, innocent 13 year old girl with her first boyfriend. she loves him so much that she would do whatever he wants her to. that's not good, but that's a different story. (again, we are in middle school.)

we (me and my friends, including friend1,) decided as a group that someone HAS to tell friend2, and SOON. i personally think I should tell her. not because i think im better than my friends, because i dont. i am usually the one who delivers bad news, so i have some experience. i am also more gentle and less descriptive. i skip graphic details and get to the point when delivering bad news. anyways, friend1 thinks she and another girl, who isnt involved should tell friend2. i think friend2 wouldnt believe it, because she would think friend2 was jealous. friend2 knows im not jealous of her boyfriend. friend1 is scared to death that friend2 will break up with 14, and tell him why. he will know that friend1 told on him and he WILL abuse her in some way. a normal student would be expelled for this, but will the head master expel his own son??? (such a test of integrity.)
the only other option i can think of is to tell a teacher. but then friend1 might be expelled, and i know she will be mad.
PLEASE pray and PLEASE comment with ANY advice, verses, or anything encouraging. who should tell her?? should we tell a teacher?? what can we do???? im so confused and torn!!!! i DONT want anyone to get hurt, but i don't want to get my friend expelled!!!! PRAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Reach Out 1
by: Brandi

Your concern for your friend is really Christ-like. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!(Ecclesiastes 4:10).
First of all, you need to pray about friend one, that friend that cuts herself.

Tell her about the love of Jesus, how no matter what, that no depth, no height, no width, absolutely nothing will separate her from the love of Jesus, even cutting cannot separate her from his love. Show her this site, and other young girl's struggles about cutting; I feel that they might uplift her.

But also, tell an adult you trust about her cutting because when young girls cut, there is an underlying issue that needs to be dealt with or ultimately you might lose your friend from her cutting too deep one day. Yes, she may get mad, but you are trying to save her life.

I pray that God has his hand of protection over her, and pierces her heart through your words, that she feels his love and care, and that she no longer feels the need to cut. constantly pray for your friend, and reach out to her, DO NOT relent about telling her about the love of Jesus and accepting him into her heart!

I'm 18, and I've struggled with cutting myself. It is not God's will that we, as beautiful creations should harm ourselves with cutting, and your friend needs to realize that. I understand it is hard, on both you and her, but you need to reach out and get her help. Don't let fear stop you because God has not given you a spirit of fear, but one of peace and a sound mind. In your reaching out, you are showing her that you love her no matter what her reaction is. Just remember to always be there for her, let her know that you are there and that you care, that you are someone that wants to help her, and have an offered ear, as well as a shoulder to cry on when needed.

Reach Out 2
by: Brandi

As for friend number two, you are right, she would think that your other friend is jealous, but you must be honest. I think you should tell your friend about the guy, but do it gently. Let her know that you are doing it out of love, and nothing else.

And you should tell your parents because they can have their voice heard sooner than yours. I pray that God will lead you in who to go to and will provide the words to say. Do it quickly though because your friend's heart and virginity is very sacred. it is the heart that god judges and has given us love in, and our virginity is the most prized gift that we can give to our husbands on our wedding night.

To be honest, I've even held on to my first kiss. I'm almost 19 and never had my first kiss because its a special gift I am saving for my husband. And if you fear friend number one being abused, go to your parents as soon as possible. in this situation you are trying to prevent two people from being hurt, and you must act now and tell your parents. They will help you. I know its hard to go to your parents, but they really do help. If I would of went to my parents for so many things, I wouldn't of struggled with a lot of things.

Don't let fear get to you, but act for your heart is crying out for justice.

With the love of Christ,
Brandi

Prayer works
by: Anonymous

Pray

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