by Matell Walker
(Saint Louis, MO)
As beautiful as GOD created me to be!!!!
Dear LORD, I come to you in prayer through my words.
I PRAY that you help and assist me in the right path I need to go.
I want to be able to walk through the valley of the shadows of death and fear no evil.
But who lives there life with nothing in the world to fear? Well to me it’s unbelievable.
I may not suppose to, but LORD I have a fear of life.
I fear that maybe my battle between life and death will be my hardest fight.
I want to be assured that everything will be okay each day.
I close my eyes, fold my hands, and get on two knees and PRAY.
I PRAY for help, I PRAY for guidance, and also PRAY for forgiveness.
Because I have faults and I still hope to receive a blessing.
LORD, please forgive me for the sins I have committed and those I haven’t.
I think about my wrong doings each day I wake.
My life feels scarred like a never healing wound.
LORD please deliver me from this hectic life real soon.
I know you have given me life for a specific reason.
But why the lifestyle of a long lost woman, a women nobody believes in.
I know I’m not perfect, LORD trust me I know.
But I feel like I’m stuck with no place to go.
Nor am I the only person who go through struggles.
But personally, I don’t think it’s something I can handle any more.
Dear Father in Heaven I PRAY to you with all my courage and honest words.
I wish I was getting closer to Heaven then earth, like a high flying bird.
I love no other man, you’re the only man I could count on.
Unlike my father who brought me in this world, i don’t think he could ever realize how much he hasn’t done since the day I was born.
You gave me a mother who loves me unconditionally.
But at the same time left us for all the wrong substances.
So who do I turn to now as parents?
I’m sorry if it seems like I sound a little arrogant.
I try to stay strong through the trials and tribulations.
But for twenty-one years I’ve been running out of patience.
I know you have an extra blessing to spare.
If so I wont mess it up for nothing, I wouldn’t dare.
There may not be things I can’t see right in front of my eyes.
But I’m trying and trying, can you just give me a sign.
Dear LORD, I ask that you watch over those I love the most.
I feel like my life is a drug, and I’m on the verge of overdose.
LORD if there is a Heaven will you kindly take me there?
Because anything is better than my life here.
People may look and judge me if they wish.
But one thing they can never take away, is my faithfulness.
I know what I’ve become, because you made me this way.
People who judge me, sinfully there’s a price they have to pay.
People go on and on about a sin I commit everyday.
But how can I be punished for being who I am, when Father you created me this way.
But there’s just no way I could take this heartache.
LORD, I know I’m strong but there’s only so much I can take.
I want you to not take just a piece, a little, or half my pain.
I wish that it will all go away.
I will continue to praise you, til you send for me.
And when that day come I will finally be free.
I know you love me no matter what from the outside in.
Thank you for hearing and listening to my prayer. AMEN